{"id":5163,"date":"2022-11-20T09:07:38","date_gmt":"2022-11-20T08:07:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/?p=5163"},"modified":"2022-12-22T14:17:56","modified_gmt":"2022-12-22T13:17:56","slug":"a-bird-flew-into-the-window","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/","title":{"rendered":"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n
Yesterday the sun was shining, finally a day without fog. I was alone at home, the children at school and kindergarten, my husband on a business trip, in a country far away.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I wiped the table on the terrace, wanted to have lunch in the sun. I picked up my plate of soup and stepped on the same spot where I had stood a moment before to wipe the table. She lay right next to my foot. A lifeless body. Yellow plumage, blue head. I looked at her for just a second, then I ran inside.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 <\/div>\n
She must have flown into the window.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
This morning, after I get the kids out of the house, my husband calls. I can tell by the look on his face that something is wrong.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
And then he starts crying and my world comes crashing down.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
My friend Elizabeth Mata.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
My sister Eli.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 <\/div>\n
The person I am connected to in my heart and will always be connected to. is dead. Her lifeless body lies there, in a country far away.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I stare out the kitchen window and see that the grey stain has fluffy feathers. Bird feathers.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n
Why am I just realizing this now?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 <\/div>\n
Death – stain – body – why did this chain of understanding take so long?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 <\/div>\n
I can’t believe that the sister of my heart is gone! Her cheerfulness, her laughter. Her wild desire to become a mom and her all-encompassing love for her daughter and husband.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 <\/div>\n
I look at pictures. This stuffed animal she sent my daughter for her birth; it sits in my homeoffice on the windowsill. I see that stuffed animal in front of me every day.<\/div>\n
 <\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I see her in front of me. She is there. Inside me. But the pain is also there. And it grows.<\/div>\n<\/div>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t

Three days later...<\/h4>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
When I don\u2019t know what to write, because my head is spinning in disbelief and my heart is heavy, but needs to speak, I play with words. I write one, randomly, like this one<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
A<\/div>
L<\/div>
I<\/div>
V<\/div>
E<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
And then I add words, as they come to me<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Adventure<\/div>
Love<\/div>
Imagine<\/div>
Vulcano<\/div>
Eli<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
And then I write, by hand, from the heart.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Life is an adventure. Always. But we forget and we get up in the morning, most mornings these days, and spool off a routine. As if life was something to get through, to master so that you arrive at the end of the day and can start all over again the next one.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Then something happens that reminds you, in a way you were unable to imagine just a minute earlier.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Life is short.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Damn short for some.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
And we don\u2019t know who these some are.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Until we know.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
I know who they are. They are Elif and Aaka and now Eli.\u00a0<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div>
My love Eli. My friend and sister. Even my colleague. She was so much to so many of us.\u00a0She was a volcano of love and joy and laughter and wits and caring and passion. She was a mother and a wife, a daughter and a sister. My sister in heart.<\/span><\/div><\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Aaka was a mother when she drowned. A friend, a colleague, a passionate health professional.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Elif was a mother of an unborn child when she was shot and killed by terrorists.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
Life is an adventure.<\/div>
\u00a0<\/div><\/div>
All I can do is honor these amazing, wonderful women not by simply getting through the day, but by living and feeling every day to the fullest. By being truly alive.<\/div><\/div>
\u00a0<\/div>
Rest in peace dear Eli. I love you!<\/div><\/div>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Why didn’t I see it before? Why didn’t I notice?! This greyish stain on the large kitchen window – more like a glass front from kitchen to dining room. The stain is a little higher than eye level, I see it when I’m doing the dishes. Now I wonder how many days it has been there. I have seen it but not really noticed it. I can’t even tell how many days it has been there. <\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":5164,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[34,26],"class_list":["post-5163","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-personal","tag-deutsch","tag-english"],"yoast_head":"\nA bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead - The Writing Flow<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead - The Writing Flow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Why didn't I see it before? Why didn't I notice?! This greyish stain on the large kitchen window - more like a glass front from kitchen to dining room. The stain is a little higher than eye level, I see it when I'm doing the dishes. Now I wonder how many days it has been there. I have seen it but not really noticed it. I can't even tell how many days it has been there.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Writing Flow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-11-20T08:07:38+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-12-22T13:17:56+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"640\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"480\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Stefanie\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Stefanie\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Stefanie\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b\"},\"headline\":\"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-11-20T08:07:38+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-12-22T13:17:56+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\"},\"wordCount\":631,\"commentCount\":2,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"deutsch\",\"english\"],\"articleSection\":[\"personal\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\",\"name\":\"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead - The Writing Flow\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-11-20T08:07:38+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-12-22T13:17:56+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg\",\"width\":640,\"height\":480},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/\",\"name\":\"The Writing Flow\",\"description\":\"Writing coach who can relate to women\u2019s need for voice and self-care\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"},{\"@type\":[\"Person\",\"Organization\"],\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b\",\"name\":\"Stefanie\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Steffie_19.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Steffie_19.jpg\",\"width\":1336,\"height\":2001,\"caption\":\"Stefanie\"},\"logo\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie\",\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie\/\",\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/stefaniebrodmann\/\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/author\/stefanie\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead - The Writing Flow","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/","og_locale":"en_GB","og_type":"article","og_title":"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead - The Writing Flow","og_description":"Why didn't I see it before? Why didn't I notice?! This greyish stain on the large kitchen window - more like a glass front from kitchen to dining room. The stain is a little higher than eye level, I see it when I'm doing the dishes. Now I wonder how many days it has been there. I have seen it but not really noticed it. I can't even tell how many days it has been there.","og_url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/","og_site_name":"The Writing Flow","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie","article_published_time":"2022-11-20T08:07:38+00:00","article_modified_time":"2022-12-22T13:17:56+00:00","og_image":[{"width":640,"height":480,"url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"Stefanie","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Stefanie","Estimated reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/"},"author":{"name":"Stefanie","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b"},"headline":"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead","datePublished":"2022-11-20T08:07:38+00:00","dateModified":"2022-12-22T13:17:56+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/"},"wordCount":631,"commentCount":2,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg","keywords":["deutsch","english"],"articleSection":["personal"],"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/","url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/","name":"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead - The Writing Flow","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg","datePublished":"2022-11-20T08:07:38+00:00","dateModified":"2022-12-22T13:17:56+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/IMG_2757.jpg","width":640,"height":480},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/a-bird-flew-into-the-window\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"A bird flew into the window, and now my sister is dead"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/","name":"The Writing Flow","description":"Writing coach who can relate to women\u2019s need for voice and self-care","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-GB"},{"@type":["Person","Organization"],"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bb898c90cce197ab8fb4ad181037a21b","name":"Stefanie","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Steffie_19.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Steffie_19.jpg","width":1336,"height":2001,"caption":"Stefanie"},"logo":{"@id":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thewritingflow.stefanie\/","https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/stefaniebrodmann\/"],"url":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/author\/stefanie\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5163"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5163"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5163\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5164"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5163"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5163"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thewritingflow.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5163"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}